Most Likely to Have Your Stuff

Winners: Jacob & Ted

Staff says:

Jacob: Jacob is known for two things at the sanctuary: Flirting with the girls across the hall, and making magnificent nests. His nesting hobby means he’s quite the hay hoarder. He takes hay from all the other bedrooms in his group and makes himself a nice, big, luxurious nest that would make any chimp jealous.

Ted: “Tedly” steals food from everyone in his group. Often you’ll find him walking with oranges in all of his hands and feet, carefully balancing as much of his cache on his body as he can. Food gets him so excited that he makes great, over-the-top food noises and whimpers at others in his group so they feel sorry for him and give up more of the good stuff.

Most Eternally Distracted
Most Likely to Have a Reality Show